While on the plane home today, I was seated behind an elderly couple.  As someone who loves to study people and their interactions, I found it quite beautiful to watch them.  Not only did the woman flash me a pleasant smile as I was getting into my seat, but I also observed her get up during the flight to bring her partner a cup of water and watched as they locked eyes on one another.  Later in the flight she began to scratch his back under his shirt for about 10 minutes straight as he leaned forward somewhat clumsily resting on the open tray table in front of him.

Once off the plane, I ran to the restroom before the luggage carousel started moving and on my way back, I saw that same woman standing alone leaning against a wall.  I decided to go over and tell her how moved I was by her beautiful gestures of love for her partner and how happy, watching them made me feel.  As soon as I did, her eyes welled up with tears, she said he’d been so healthy only up until 5 days ago and now she was beyond worried for his health.  I told her how sorry I was to hear this and that I’ll be sending him well wishes.  Of course, my heart immediately ached for her, for them and for their fear of the unknown as they battle this health journey together.

It only crossed my mind on that car ride home from the airport that I hadn’t spent any time thinking about my resolution for 2023.  It’s so out of character for me because I usually have one picked by December and pride myself on starting before the new year, as if that means I’m sure to stick with it!

Obviously having this couple still on my mind, I purposely turned off the radio and really tried to drop into what I would like to see different for myself this coming year.  The words LOVE MORE was all that came to mind.  Then, just the word LOVE.  It’s a funny word love, because it’s usually spoken in the direction of our significant other, our family, friends, etc.  Saying the word over and over to myself I knew I was thinking of something different.  The feeling I was trying to cultivate was love for MYSELF and love for the collective, EVERYONE.  That’s when I decided to break it down using it as an acronym to summarize what was welling up in me.

L.

Listen.  Listen more to my thoughts, my feelings and those of the people I engage with.  How do I plan to listen more to myself?  I already have a meditation practice, but when I sit, I’ll take the intention of listening deeply to my inner being.  I plan to make a point of taking pauses in my day and ask myself if what I’m doing is aligned with my purpose and am I acting within the space of my own authenticity.  Being in touch with my body – do I feel a tug in my stomach or my heart when something feels wrong?  If so, I plan to have an internal dialogue with myself when I get a quiet moment and speak to myself as I would a good friend.  I also plan to toss my old 2022 journal and start a new one.  Writing down my thoughts is loving time spent on me.  When we’re truly present for ourselves, deeply listening to our own needs and creating the boundaries necessary to live out our happiest life, in turn we’re then able to give LOVE from that full cup.  In the end, everyone benefits from our family to friends and even strangers we engage with.

O.

Open.  I’ve been in my own body for over 4 decades, I know myself – inside and out.  I’m aware of my likes, dislikes, my strengths, passions, etc.  But do I?  While studying at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, we were taught to use a beginners mind.  It was something I’d never heard before and it really made me think.  By having an open mind, we refrain from the “I already know that” attitude to one that says, “well, let me hear how you see it”.  Practicing open-mindedness is a door-opener to possibilities you never knew were there for the taking.  It’s a way of saying, yes to the fix-up even if you think the person is not going to be your type.  It’s trying a new sport because your friend is passionate about it and asks you to join and it’s also hearing another’s point of view on a topic you already feel to be an expert.  Open-mindedness is a practice I plan to remind myself of going into this new-year and it covers so many areas of life, from career and relationships to hobbies and play.

V.

Volunteer.  This is one that’s near and dear to my heart as I truly believe NOTHING brings about happiness more than giving to others.  I don’t say this lightly as I can speak from experience in saying that giving back has helped pull me out of some of my roughest life moments.  In thinking about where I can give back more this year, what comes to mind is my passion for volunteering at my local domestic violence crisis center.  Taking an extra hotline shift once or twice a month in this coming year will remind me of the reward that comes from holding space for another.  Do you have a skill that could benefit someone?  Pay it forward with Skills Based Volunteering (SBV).  Offering your expertize could have a positive social impact on your community and is a wonderful way of practicing both self-love and love for the collective!

E.

Empower.  Even as I type this word I’m picturing a fist pumping icon.  Empower is such a powerful but also deeply loving word.  It’s saying, “yes I/you can do it”.   We all know life can be extremely hard and yet we all strive to live our best lives.  The ways in which we can go about empowering ourselves and others is endless but one of my favorites is positive self-talk.  The practice and popularity of positive affirmations are based on widely accepted and well-studied psychological theories.  Dr. Terry Wahls is a firm believer of putting our own name to the affirmation and speaking it out loud.  In fact, she recommends doing so with what she refers to as the “warrior pose”.  Stand up with legs slightly spread apart, place hands on your hips and recite your affirmation out loud beginning with using your own name. Give this a try in 2023 – I can assure you, it can be extremely affirming!

Happy 2023 to all of you and so much love from my heart to yours!!

Meri